League Reads

A few weeks back, I was desperately trying to find either a Big League or Rugby League Week. I checked newsagencies in Richmond, Carlton, Brighton and the city, but found none. One place on Elizabeth St had just sold out of the Big League 2005 preview, but that was as close as I got.

This either means that newsagents don't stock league mags because they think that no-one will buy them, or that league is so popular down here that all the mags are sold out pretty much straight away.

Yesterday the plot thickened a bit when I was at Transit News at Melbourne Central, trying to find a Rugby League Week. At first I couldn't see any, but then discovered that some pathetic league-hater had hidden them underneath a pile of car magazines. I liberated the two remaining copies and started to read one. 30 seconds later, a dude comes along and happily picks up the last copy. If not for the fact that I subscribe to RLW (except seem to get it days after it's released), I would have bought the copy I was flicking through, thereby causing a sell-out.

So, what have we learnt today? Not a lot, except that league mags are a hot seller a newsagencies need to order more. Now.

Alex Chan mystery solved!

First, get up to speed.

OK, so last year Alex had a problem with hitting dudes in the head while trying to tackle them. This caused Channy a whole heap of anguish and he swore never to smack the head of a player he was trying to tackle again, even if it was Terry Hill. Against the Dragons though, he discovered that he didn't even need to be tackling someone else to give them a taste of his forearm. Which leads us to the sad scenario before us of the big guy not being able to play until next week and the $10 000 fine hanging over his head. Who is to blame for this? Supercoach Bellamy? No. The Chan-Meister? No. Shaun Timmins? Maybe, but no. Someone else entirely? Yes!

After a prolonged analysis of the situation, The Forecast believes that AFL-pusher and Collingwood supremo, E. McGuire has meddled with Channy's metal-plated arm and can control how high or low it can be raised. Without going into the specific scientific research that The Forecast has gathered (none), let's cut to the chase and simply elaborate on how and why the E-man has sabotaged Chan's career.

The 'why' is obvious; McGuire fears the Storm and the exciting brand of league that we play. If we were to get too successful in Melbourne, focus would be taken away from the AFL and Eddie's gutless, pathetic Magpies (for the record, The Forecast is also a Blues supporter). So, by negating one of our star players every so often, the Storm's on-field performance suffers and our success is therefore stymied.

The 'how' is a remote control device installed by dodgey doctors who were paid-off by Eddie, when Chan had a metal plate inserted to fix his broken arm back when he played for the Eels. The Forecast is close to 1% percent sure that this is %100 accurate.

Alex battles constantly with his arm and thanks to his amazing willpower, has overcome Eddie's ability to raise it while tackling (E-Dawg tried and failed during the Newcastle game). Unfortunately, as we witnessed against the Dragons, McGuire has found a new way of ruining Chan's career. And Timmins's pretty face.

The Forecast is on to you, McGuire!

Bugger, part 1.

The other day I was looking over the draw, trying to figure out when we would actually loose a game. The stunning conclusion that I came to was that we wouldn’t. Well, maybe when we played the Bulldogs away, but that was about as close as we’d get. As of now, I’m not going to do that again because obviously we are not the Superforce I imagined us to be.

I want Peter Robinson back and I want him back now!

Er...

It's kind of strange for the NRL season to have started AND for the Storm to be playing so well and for The Forecast not to be commenting on it. The strangeness continues!

Backpage Billy



If only it was like this in The Age every day!




It begins...


(MX 8/3/2005)

The first qoute doesn't make sense, but apart from that this is a nice little article. Hopefully the commuters of Melbourne will know what's good for them and rock up to Melbourne Park on Sunday.

More coverage on the Storm launch can be found here and here. The Forecast's Season Preview 2005 should be up later this week. I'm sure both of you can't wait.


Genius Idea

On Monday in the Herald Sun there was an article on Billy and how he's great and could be the Storm's new Glenn Lazarus and be a conduit for the people of Victoria to get into supporting the greatest rugby league team known to man, etc, etc.

It also mentioned his history and how he drove down to Melbourne in a beat-up Mitsubishi Magna and started with nothing and all that. ANYWAY, if Mitsubishi knew what was good for them, they'd make a car in Billy's honour and you and me would probably buy it. Hopefully it'll look waaaay better than the embarrassing-looking 'artist's concept' that I cobbled together and have one of those sweet-looking motors that stick up through the bonnet. Do it, Mitusbishi!!

Big Willie Style

Well, this sure was strange to read. I have a feeling that he'll stay a doggie, which is either good or bad depending on if you like him or think he's a tool. For the record, I think he's a likable tool.

Also, pretty good headline, but why not Storm: We will pay for Willie?! Ha.

Matt King vs. a wall

If you've ever wanted to see Matt King burst through a wall, flanked by a dude playing Football and a dude playing AFL, then your dreams have just come true! If you go to the main Reebok page you'll discover that they've also invented a DJ shoe. Lame...

Very, very slow news day.

Go to Google News and type in 'Brian Waldron' and amongst other things it comes up with a report from Fox Sports dated 28/2 which is identical to a report in the Herlad Sun dated 11/2. Weird. Pointless, but weird nonetheless.

Paranoid Bunnies

The other day the Sydney Morning Herald ran an article about a proposed move for the South Sydney Rabbitohs to Stadium Australia (the big place where the Olympics were). Ex-Storm guy Chris Johns had some pretty good advice for them (I thought), but I don't think it went down too well. Head over to www.rabbitohs.com and check out their message boards for analysis along the lines of "Shit team, shit city, shitface management....this is the Melbourne Storm" and conspiracy theories that give the impression that the average Souths fan sleeps with a gun under his pillow, forever fearing that a News Limited stooge will break into his home and poison his children.